Phaedrus simply isn’t having it this evening. Hillel feels the need to explain himself again as is usually the case. Thus, the apothecary shop is either drawing or chasing away customers as the argument goes. There is a small silence and then phaedress makes his opening jab.
So these are the words that come into your head?
Do you mean the title?
Yes. What does this mean?
Phaedrus, my friend, are you sure you want to go there?
What did I say that was wrong?
That was a good question.
So we are two men of this Earth.
That we are. I am a lowly scribe to the big guy himself, no small lalala there, and you are the without flaw endless apothecary to the stars. You are a legend here in the bazaar under Sinai.
I see you are a poet tonight. You are Hilel. This is an important figure.
Do you think I am vain or even tyrancially gay or something like that? Am I letting my acting get the best of me? Can’t I just enjoy the literature for what it is? Sometimes you read something and it just tears your soul up. Didn’t you ever have that?
I read. I read I read. I’m an apothecary. I’m an educated man. What are we saying?
I don’t think we speak the same language.
I know we don’t speak the same language.
No. I speak your language perfectly. I understand every nuance of everything you say. Fair enough. I’ve been here long enough. I ought to have learned something. But never was there even a time since the Egyptians decided to reoccupy that anybody wanted to know my side of the story. And I was writing about it. I hold a grudge.
Hmm I understand. I understand you hold a grudge.
With you? Of course. It means we’re brothers and you’re not supposed to hurt your brother.
Brothers and whores.
So we are talking about an Egyptian occupation. You yourself know that there was quite a different feeling before the Egyptians. We were more like brothers. We were ourselves.
I remember your meaning. I remember you. I remember your name. Everything has meaning. To be alive again.
Excuse me. Stop. This is my job. My point was this exactly. About dwelling and heading to depression as a way of really enjoying yourself. Which is sometimes breaking things that shouldn’t be broke without noticing it and other such things that such wonderful nonchalant people sometimes make mistakes and break. You understand me right?
You’re stopping me for a reason.
No, not at all. I’m just saying that there’s a difference between when you are a man living a man’s life and when you are another man’s man living their lives and their dreams and making sure they have all the things they want. As a way of life. As a way of life that people think they want or are there just so many paid bullies out there to say oh no that’s what we want? Is it really a world full of thugs and nothing less?
And you’re saying that I’m a thug?
No. I would never say such a thing. You are an apothecary. You are actually an artist as an apothecary. That you exist is a mark to the glory of what you have created. You are wanted and needed and loved. And of course, we get to be rich. Why not?
You will never know what rich is.
Tell me something about what rich is.
Rich is when you don’t know anything about anything but you couldn’t care less about it. Rich is when you just don’t care. I say what’s mine is mine and that’s the way it is. I say that’s rich. Rich as I want to be. Rich as I want to feel. I feel like a poet. I feel like a poet standing on a mountain of money and just wondering which way my feet would ride best down the slope.
You’re addicted to money and power. You really like it.
I love it. It’s all I ever wanted to be.
Congratulations. I’ve never had these kinds of aspirations. I’ve never cared about owning other people. I’ve kind of always been against slavery. Joining. Bending the knee. That’s Egyptian. I won’t bend the knee.
But how about all the people who are waiting for just this moment from you. Aren’t you afraid of them?
Well, I guess I’ll explain how this works. You can’t win anything because there’s nothing to be won. The point is weather or not we are working as a command towards a legitimate goal that would please any human being occupying space in time.
All right. I understand you. We’re just people. But maybe you’re very big. But maybe I’m bigger.
You know, you might be right. I can see how this would look like celebrity night if someone were watching the meat again. If it was just a matter of this mark or that costume and what it looked like in the picture then yeah, this is clash of the Titans here. Or you know, something to do because they’re so freaking bored.
These are our brothers.
Got it. But listen to what I say because it’s kind of what I have to say. You don’t need to do this. There are actual things to do that need doing that we should allow everyone to participate in instead of doing whatever sort of dramatically horrible for the environment work they do. And this would include law enforcement because we need good men who want to do more than harass people as you waste the horses practicing your chariot skills.
You want me to stop being an apothecary?
No! God forbid. You stay here. You are one of the necessary facilitators. We need you. Haha
All right I won’t argue that one.
No man, it’s not just about police or soldiers. It’s all of them. How many people you got walking around beating other people just so they know that the bullies win? And then how many bullies do we make? And how many bullies do they have teaching of the rules and looking into our business to find out how much punishment they can give us? Why are there so many people so interested in how other people live?= Why is this the mark of a man? I mean how far have we actually traveled from civilization that we don’t know the difference between people who have nothing to chew on but other people and human beings that might otherwise be put to decent use.
That’s the problem. I don’t want to be put to use.
Good. Good. I’ve got it for this. This is for anybody right? Okay. We have to grow food. We need something to eat. Yes, you can make money and buy the food but what’s going to be a big big big change is that we have to grow the food. We are going to be responsible that’s you and everybody around you, we are all growing the food.
We would rather eat meat.
All right so this I understand. This everybody understands. But your need, and really let’s dwell drunkenly on those words, your needs, let us just dwell to the end of every resource on the planet so we can resolve that problem. But your need is not the thing that will matter if you can’t count yourself as more than one part of the problem. These things you need require resources and the toll on others is too much to bear. But worse, what meat does to the region and to its resources. We could have this place full of trees. We could have this be a place anyone would want to live with plenty of fresh air and plenty of food. The winter is a beautiful growing time and there’s so many beautiful things we can eat if we just stop letting the herds eat everything that has a chance of growing.
I see. The punishment is being made to understand what killing animals costs us. You know, I don’t know about this individual thinking business. I like being of the group more. It’s more profitable.
Except you are an individual. You are just one person. You’re the only you. You want to accredit yourself just so it’s easier to tell you from other people that’s fine but in essence, I am an ape who learned the power of speech and so are you. But in essence, and I’m not looking for reasons why you would win in a fight because I give you the V like I don’t care. But in essence we are the same and therefore you are another someone like me. And if my words hurt you it is because you are a thing that can be hurt. And if you fear me because I might say something that hurts you, then it’s very difficult to be friends because if we’re just two people, I can react and you can react and then we figure out how to be brothers again. Or leave each other alone forever. Which is very difficult and very lonely for everybody. Well you have a business and I like to come to this business so you’re probably going to see my face once or twice even if I don’t start talking and you don’t start talking. Usually we just start talking but anyway what were you saying?
