I have a friend who has immigrated from Russia to Norway. I am told she loves how modern it is despite how cold and long the winters are.
But my thoughts are always how they should communicate with their neighbors, the filth. You don’t have to name them the filth but it’s a good name for them and you know who I’m talking about. I had quickly a few ideas and of course, Google quickly told me I am not the first person to think about it and maybe come up with some good ideas for a completely green Norway
Fact number one: it’s windy as hell in Norway.
You don’t need to build giant windmills. But you can have a bunch of small ones that will generate enough electricity to power everything in the country. And I know they also have ways of generating electricity from the movement of the sea.
And I’m talking about rich from wind power. Enough energy not only to run your appliances and your computers, but enough to keep your electric care going without problem. Cheap energy! Listen to me when I speak: cheap energy! And of course, we don’t need the filth in the air generally. Can you imagine the beauty of a northern evening without air pollution? And forget about being a vegan, can you imagine the beauty of food from an unpolluted sea?
Bagels and Norwegian salmon on Sunday morning. And even this is not so expensive if the sea is allowed to become abundant again. It’s over. There’s no fight. Okay, maybe that’s for our grandkids but you get the idea.
Fact number two: it is possible to grow citrus fruits in Norway using proper greenhouse techniques
I don’t need to link to this but it’s also something to think about that you don’t necessarily need to save all solar energy in banks. You can have a slow release system that catches the light and extends it slightly making a longer growing season inside the warm structure.
Personally, I’m okay with Mandarin oranges. I like how easy they are to take the peel off of and how sweet they are. They are very popular here in the winter season. Imagine if they are locally grown in all communities in their greenhouses. Seriously, wouldn’t you just laugh at the rest of the world?
Fact number three: the shorter the distance from where the food is grown, the less pollution and garbage needed to deliver it. And locally grown foods can be carried home naked in reusable containers.
Locally grown versus imported food
I don’t need to say this too many times but obviously Norway is a miserable place to grow some foods traditionally. But it doesn’t have to be this way if you add modern techniques like greenhousing and extending light. Lessening the carbon footprint means better air quality and of course, if you can’t ride a bicycle year-round and you don’t want to put the spikes on your shoes to go to the market, electric cars with all of that wind and fast internet connection make living there rather sweet. And for a man like me, I love long winters and the quiet and the solitude. If I can get some good healthy food as well that is locally grown, when I talk to the neighbors, the filth, I like to show them who is number one.
Fact number four: quit your Christian suffering immediately and legalize marijuana.
Legality of marijuana in Norway
Booyah! I didn’t know this. I was under the belief that these people were the dumbest marijuana Nazis in the world and loved to suffer more than anybody. But it turns out that Norway at least allows medical marijuana. And let me tell you something about cancer patients and having access to some decent grass. Someone call Snoop Dogg and tell him what’s up. Norway got a little hip.
A mental illustration if you can of an old Jewish guy with a big beard dancing a jig.
Personally, I have been writing about what it’s like living next door to the filth for many years now. Living in the north is actually kind of nice for slow meditative people like myself. Start letting people work from home, get out of gasoline cars and keep the distance of food travel minimum. Let the electricity from the wind and sea warm the houses and life is possible. And yeah, boray pari haganja and add two mandatory days off where gasoline motors are completely forbidden and you’ve got yourself a northern paradise there.
Final fact about Norway: Found in the Translation was written for a Norwegian news gazette.
The original journalism for the activities of the filth in Western Russia is what it’s all about and part of the Nobel prize was awarded because of the work of the great independent journalist, Tatiana Britskaya. Me? I’m just the English. I just helped move things along a little bit.
And you know what, you don’t need Amazon just like we don’t need the filth. Just send me a request and we can work out a deal. Hell, if I like you, I’ll send you the collection for free.
And okay, feel free to read the Barents Independent Observer.
Cheers…
