From the bazaar under Sinai: Bo and it’s time to go vegan

From chabad.org: Bo in a Nutshell
Exodus 10:1–13:16
The name of the Parshah, “Bo,” means “Come [to Pharaoh]” and it is found in Exodus 10:1.

The last three of the Ten Plagues are visited on Egypt: a swarm of locusts devours all the crops and greenery; a thick, palpable darkness envelops the land; and all the firstborn of Egypt are killed at the stroke of midnight of the 15th of the month of Nissan.

G‑d commands the first mitzvah to be given to the people of Israel: to establish a calendar based on the monthly rebirth of the moon. The Israelites are also instructed to bring a “Passover offering” to G‑d: a lamb or kid goat is to be slaughtered, and its blood sprinkled on the doorposts and lintel of every Israelite home, so that G‑d should pass over these homes when He comes to kill the Egyptian firstborn. The roasted meat of the offering is to be eaten that night together with matzah (unleavened bread) and bitter herbs.

The death of the firstborn finally breaks Pharaoh’s resistance, and he literally drives the children of Israel from his land. So hastily do they depart that there is no time for their dough to rise, and the only provisions they take along are unleavened. Before they go, they ask their Egyptian neighbors for gold, silver and garments—fulfilling the promise made to Abraham that his descendants would leave Egypt with great wealth.

The children of Israel are commanded to consecrate all firstborn, and to observe the anniversary of the Exodus each year by removing all leaven from their possession for seven days, eating matzah, and telling the story of their redemption to their children. They are also commanded to wear tefillin on the arm and head as a reminder of the Exodus and their resultant commitment to G‑d.


***


1

Hillel the scribe is at home when suddenly he has an unexpected visitor. It is his wife, Eva.

Good morning.

Oh no. This is not going to be good.

Are you already so afraid of me?

You’ve been a punishment to my life from the moment I’ve met you. And that I still love you makes it all the worse. Please, tell me your business quickly and leave me in peace.

Have you no desire to spend any time with me at all? Many men love my time and pay me well for it.

Yes, yes, yes. I am well aware of what a fool I am from your escapades. Quickly, please, tell me your business and be gone.

I had really hoped for a more friendly visit.

Friendly is the only thing I have never seen from you.

Very well. I’ve come here to talk seriously to you.

All right.

Jibril asked me to come see you.

Jibril of the meat association? What on earth would he want with me?

It seems you have become someone. You are now a person of note and interest to the meat association. I was sent to talk some sense into you and perhaps to offer you something in exchange for a slight alteration of your policy.

I see. I’ve been given editorship of the Daily Papyrus and now I am a known voice. What are you saying? The meat association is afraid of me?

I’m not sure I could describe it as fear as much as anger and a desire to have you mutilated and killed.

I see. You are here to warn me not to advise people to be vegan?

I don’t think we are asking for people to believe completely in the health benefits of an only meat diet.

Our smartest people have determined that almost every single disease going through our village has to do with meat. Either meat that has gone bad or just simply diseases that it carries inside it. All of the people who are living on plants are the only ones to have not suffered even one of the common ailments that are causing us great unhappiness.

That may be but we’re not really interested in that being in print in public.

I don’t understand what you’re talking about. Moses gave me authorship and the right to do this specifically because I am vegan and I do not respect meat nor do I want it in my life. He shared very nice food that had no death in it with us and he saw something. That’s why I am here. Why on earth would I go against the very thing that gave me my charter in the first place?

Out of fear of pain?

Perhaps I should write that you are threatening me.

Again, I would not say that they are threatening you. It’s just sort of an obvious thing that people who have no problem ripping apart animals for food would not have too much problem ripping apart a human being, especially a somewhat frail human being such as yourself.

I am intellectually strong. I do not need to be anybody’s body.

Perhaps. I think with they are interested in is a little advertising.

You want me to advertise the meat business in a vegan gazette? Are you people truly insane?

We are just saying that it might be a little healthy to include a little bit of meat, just to keep you strong and on edge.

It doesn’t make you strong. It makes you insane. It makes us into these machines. Nobody wants this. At least nobody who’s ever looked at the other side wants this. We want a civilization. We are tired of bullies. And we’re very tired of bloodshed.

Again, this may be. But you cannot be so solid. And besides, how can you really be sure? There’s always an alternative argument to everything. Everyone knows it’s impossible to truly know anything. How come you believe with such conviction?

It’s because I went vegan! The moment I stopped eating meat, my head cleared. I saw everything clearly. And I was able to learn more. Meat makes people stupid. It makes people sick and stupid and we don’t want that. We want a healthy society with healthy people doing healthy things. And quite frankly, if we can stop being bothered by the government, we think we’d all be very well about taking care of ourselves. And truly, we would allow something for him to live on for the job of getting us here. We just don’t want your filthy animals grazing us to death and turning the whole place into a desert. That’s the point.

Well, you should consider seriously what I’m saying. When was the last time you saw an animal butchered?

I tried to avoid such sites.

Well, let your imagination be your guide.


2

The next afternoon after his writing session, Hillel found himself again with Phaedrus the apothecary.

I can’t stand the influence of the meat business.

What happened today?

They attributed that all the vegetation was eaten by locust instead of by the damn herds that the meat industry demands to walk around. I don’t know how much they paid Moses to make this up like this but this is ridiculous already. And yesterday, my wife showed up and told me the meat business wants to give me money to advertise in the Daily Papyrus.

They are a very aggressive lot. Meat eaters. You can’t live with them.

No, they just never stop touching you.

What are you going to do?

Well, I’m not going to give in. I’ve been thinking of saying exactly what happened. My feeling is if I tell the story exactly as it happened, people will realize what they are up against.

You think people realizing that the meat business is literally going to pay them to eat its product will react in anger? Actually, most people are not really so into dietary specifics like you are. They don’t see it as clearly. Not everybody has your mind.

Oh come on. It’s not so different, is it? Are you really telling me that people can’t see what’s right in front of their eyes?

I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately. Intelligence is a very funny thing. You believe that we are all people and that we should all respect each other and I completely admire that. But you do understand that not everybody is as smart as you and there’s big difference in the spectrum of what you can expect from people.

All right. And what?

Maybe it has something to do with being able to read and write. Most of our people are still illiterate. And you can’t teach an adult to read. Most people live the way they lived when we were in Egypt or at least they keep the same habits. People just wake up and do their work and come home. We don’t have that much individuality.

What are you saying?

I’m saying that people eat meat because it’s their habit to do so. And they are who they are perhaps because of this habit. But no matter what, they are who they are and the way they work is the way they work. If you’re used to living a particular way and you really don’t have the sort of imagination that allows you to see the future even logically, what makes you think they are clever enough to make these sorts of life choices for themselves?

Well this is my point. If we just stop eating meat, if we collectively stopped eating meat, we would collectively become smarter. Our minds would become cleaner. Let the animal fat go away. Let blood flow cleanly from our hearts to our minds for a change and they will see. I know this. And if they even took this first step, I think they would want to learn to read and write and they might even have the capacity to do so.

People believe what they want them to believe and they see what they want them to see.

But that’s the meat. That’s why I’m writing about this. That’s why we need to change.

You know, I would be willing to make a wager that that is not true.

What are you saying?

I’m saying that we can pick an average person, a person who eats meat regularly or whenever they are able to get their hands on it. And we get them to agree to eat beans and things instead. I would like to see for myself the difference. I don’t even believe it would be that much.

Can we write about this?

Are you sure that you would want to? And this is especially now. If they are threatening you and telling you that you are being watched, are you sure this is the time to exactly play with the theme publicly?

Why not? I’m not paranoid. Meat eaters are paranoid. I’m not paranoid. I’m never paranoid. I just see this situation evolving and I had the unfortunate luck of having to hear it from my prostitute wife. Believe me, if I felt anything at all like they might want me to feel, it is because they only know themselves. They are paranoid which is why they are attacking me. I just want healthy friends and to live in a healthy community. I mean, we are supposed to be slaves who have been freed. I think we might as well go the full distance and free ourselves as well.

All right then. I agree. Let’s put this together. We will find a perfect subject and we will see what happens.

All right. I’m game. In fact, I’m sure I’m going to win. I think you’re only doing this masochistically.

Maybe. Maybe.


3

The next day at the apothecary had the scribe with his face buried in his hands.

That must have hurt writing that. We have to take our livestock with us. That’s hilarious. How much are they paying the Egyptian to write this story?

I don’t know but I actually protested. Moses got angry at me after a while and told me to just write it but I told him I didn’t want to. I told him that this is not what happened and actually putting this into the story is telling people that this is the way they must be. I tried to tell him that the idea of the story is becoming free of slavery and yet he’s demanding, and in the story Pharaoh is demanding, that no freedom could possibly happen.

He is an Egyptian. What did you expect?

I just can’t stand it anymore. What’s the story on this bet of ours? Have you got anybody in mind?

Yes, as a matter of fact I do. Sho’ieb, the rope maker. One of his children developed the mark. He can’t read but his wife was told by other women that you wrote that it’s possible to avoid the disease by not eating meat.

Yes, I wrote that. I meant it too.

Well, I went and I spoke to them. He agrees to your terms. He will stop using meat in his diet and he will agree to take lessons. We will mark how well he does in his lessons by how many days he has not eaten meat. We will observe the difference in his capacity to learn and we will mark this as part of our experiment. I say the difference will not be much and we are who we are and that’s all we get. You believe people can grow. If it is true, I want to see it.


4

Truly, the Egyptian is going crazy.

Yes. It seems pressure from the meat business in addition to the fact that the man truly likes barbecue is coloring his writing ability. Couldn’t he think of anything else except splashing blood all over the doors?

Apparently this fight is becoming a genuine issue. The meat people are getting more and more angry. They are demanding more and more blood.

But we obviously are an influence as well. The idea of following the moon. That’s from us. To be natural and with the world, that’s us.

Yeah. We are also in the crackers. He liked the crackers I brought.

Crackers and hummus. Yum.

Yes, that’s exactly what he asked for. But then just as we were settling down for lunch, Imran and Iyub came with freshly slaughtered lamb meat that they had cooked and brought as a present. They came specifically at lunch time and Moses couldn’t help himself. He didn’t even apologize to me.

Did you have any?

No. I said no. Those two idiots laughed at me but Moses just told me to suit myself. He loves lamb and he said this was the best available.

Does he even know what a criminal he is as a leader? Does he even know how corrupt he is?

If he understood it, he wouldn’t be eating meat.

Egyptians. They will never change and they never leave us alone.

All right, be that as it may. Where is our friend?

Come. I’ll take you to him.

About 10 minutes walk from the apothecary shop was the home of Sho’ieb and Bilqis. When they arrived, the first thing they did was show them the boy.

Did you take our advice and stop feeding the boy meat?

The husband and wife nodded silently.

And the mark? Has it gotten larger or smaller?

Silently, the husband demonstrated that indeed it had become obviously smaller.

You see? I told you. It’s fundamental. Anyone can see it.

I think that’s why he’s so willing to participate.

Maybe. Well, My friend. Are you ready to try a bit of an adventure?

Silently, the man nodded once but his face looked very nervous.

I want to ask why he’s nervous but we have a bigger problem. Does this man speak generally?

I can speak.

Well that’s lucky for all of us. What is the problem with you?

I just don’t know what you want me to say.

My friend, this is exactly the problem we want to fix. The new diet starts today. What your child eats, the whole family eats. This is now a non meat family and we will come talk to you every 3 days for a lesson in reading. In between, you will study all the things I show you and practice them. Do you understand?

The man nodded.

Look, stop that already. We are verbal. We are free people. We have the ability of speech and we can say what we feel. Just speak your answers, will you?

Yes. I will try my best. My wife will help me.

Wait a minute, Hillel. She can’t do that. I don’t think women are allowed to read and write.

Phaedrus, we are breaking all the rules with this one and I intend to write every beautiful moment of it.


5

And what happened when Moses found out that the mark on the boy was smaller when he stopped eating meat?

He nodded his head. He said he was interested in hearing the results of the experiment.

Do you believe him?

No. But I think he’ll say or do anything just so I will write down the words he says without too much argument. I think he’s getting a little tired of me.

Don’t lose your job. It’s the only hope any of us have of anything even sneaking into that book. If you lose your job, they will replace you with someone who eats nothing but meat, I guarantee you.

I understand. You were the last one to visit our friend. What happened?

Well, we took your advice and I showed them the symbols and the sounds that they make. And then we practiced saying them until they were very familiar and they spent three days making sure that they learned all the letters and all the sounds. The next time I came, I showed them how we put the sounds together to form the words.

All right. But that was also 3 days without meat. Was there a difference?

It’s still very early to tell. But there was a moment that I wasn’t really expecting. It was sort of like a revelation. You know he’s not very talkative. Well, suddenly his face lit up. Suddenly he understood all by himself the combination of letters that led to words and he actually wrote some words down that he believed represented words he knew.

You mean he suddenly understood something?

Yes. It was his own original thought. And it made him so happy. He actually said the words that he saw. That’s the way he said it. I just saw it as clear as anything.

I think you’re going to lose your bet.

I tell you, scribe, I don’t think I could possibly be happier to lose a bet.


6

Yeah, they set us free but not really. No longer slaves to Egypt but still slaves to the Egyptian.

Yes. We will work on that problem at a later date. What’s the story with Sho’ieb?

The mark got worse?

Really? I can’t understand it.

No, it is understandable. I asked what they had done and I found out that someone had gotten to Bilqis. They gave her some meat to feed the boy and her husband. They told her if they didn’t do this, they would become very sick and the boy might die and she believed them.

I really didn’t expect that.

I don’t know why you didn’t expect it. It was your brilliant idea to write about it in the gazette. Everybody knows everything you’re doing.

I wanted transparency.

You’re the only one who’s transparent. The meat business is in business to stay in business and if you’re in the flesh business, that’s all anyone needs to know.

Well what did you tell them?

She said that Sho’ieb agreed to stay vegan longer. Despite the threat, he seems quite happy. He said that he likes what it feels like. He says he has a lot of energy and he generally feels better than usual. He’s also turning out to be really quite the student. He’s figuring out more and more words every day and I think he’s actually becoming a bit conversational.

That’s amazing. Are they reading yet?

He reads slowly but he’s getting faster everyday. It really is quite something. It’s a shame about the boy though. They were afraid. They were all just afraid.

But it’s at the expense of the boy’s health.

They know that now. Now they understand that.

It just follows you. It’s like death itself. It just follows you. Nothing is ever going to be easier around here until we get rid of the meat association once and for all.

This, my friend, I would love to see. I don’t believe it will ever happen. I don’t believe we’ll ever be completely rid of them. But indeed, I would love to see it.

All my life I’ve been praying for and waiting for the people to say that they don’t want to fight anymore and there will be no more war.

Yeah, someday.

Is there anything else?

Yes. Sho’ieb suggested using a little cumin in the hummus. He believes it will add a particular flavor.

He actually said that?

Yeah. Turns out our stupid friend is actually a bit of a foodie.

You’ve lost your bet.

I know I have, my friend. I know I have.


7

After the final writing session, Hillel was at home enjoying some hummus with ground cumin on an unleavened cracker. He had brought this for Moses and the man agreed that it indeed was an appropriate flavor. Unfortunately, lunch was spoiled by the arrival of Eva.

Very, very, very clever, my husband. You are indeed a very clever man.

But not more clever than you?

That is irrelevant. The people love the story. They love the intrigue. They don’t believe it’s true. Nobody believes anything is true really. But they enjoyed the experience of hearing this exciting tale of threats and dominance from the evil meat business. It’s unfortunate that nobody really believes this is anything but a story made up by their favorite writer’s imagination.

What are you talking about. This isn’t fiction. This was pure journalism. I just wrote what happened.

Perhaps. But what you intend is not necessarily what people hear. You forget, our people don’t actually have the capacity to understand anything. That’s why we have leaders in the first place. They’re the ones who do the thinking. People are not so responsible as you want them to be. To most people, it’s just an adventure story.

But this family exists. People know them.

Yes. And it was a shame what happened to the boy today.

What happened?

He died.

He died? How did he die?

Apparently it was very sudden. The way we understand it and the way we have been talking about it, it was suddenly stopping eating meat that caused his whole system to suddenly fall down. He didn’t have enough energy to live.

But that’s preposterous. That’s not at all what happens. The boy was becoming better. He was becoming stronger every day. What did you do?

Me? I did nothing.

Then who?

Perhaps Iyub had something to do with it.

What did he do? What did you do?

We thought it was a matter of honor. We promised them what would happen if they continued. We had to do it. And besides, it’s in the book.

You killed the boy?

No. Officially, he died from a lack of eating meat. Apparently he just stopped breathing

This is a little too much for the scribe to take.

Get out. Get out of here. Get out of my sight.

You really need to understand something about being responsible. If you’re going to write things in public, you’re going to have to expect reactions.

Get out of here. Get out of my house and never come back.

Of course my husband. Of course. But if it means anything to you, they would like to double their offer for some advertising in your nice little gazette. And even if you don’t agree, they’ve noticed that even talking about them seems to make people hungry. We’re getting free advertising every time you say no. You see how this works? You can’t win. You can’t escape and you can’t win.

You are a whore.

The biggest and best. And you married me. Have a good day my husband. Have a good day. But I did want to say one more thing. It is indeed a very effective way to change someone’s mind. You kill their children and they will pretty much do anything you want them to do. This is not an original idea. You yourself wrote it in the book. In any case, I don’t think you have a student anymore. I don’t think either of them ever wishes to see you or be a part of anything you do ever again. Enjoy your day. Let this be a good one to learn on for you. And really, none of us can wait to see what you have to say about this in the next edition of the gazette.