(BelTA) – The young generation of Belarusians will need to move along Belarus’ historical path in a world that is changing at breakneck speed, Belarusian President Aleksandr Lukashenko said at the Q&A session titled “Open Microphone with the President” at Vitebsk State University on 2 September, BelTA has learned.
“Today is a special day for your university. Not only because the president has come (although this does not happen often). Unfortunately, I have not been to your university before. Considering that we have fifty universities and other educational institutions, it is not so easy to visit them all during the presidential term. There is also another reason [for the visit],” noted Aleksandr Lukashenko.
The head of state recalled that at the February meeting with rectors he had given an instruction to schedule visits to universities located in the capital city and in the regions. “Secondly, the time has come to have a serious conversation with you – the generation that will continue the historical path of Belarus in a rapidly changing world. The world has changed, events are happening fast, the pace is supersonic,” the president said.
“You would agree that today we look at yesterday’s innovations as museum items. It’s not just about science, technology, the real sector of the economy. This also concerns the social sphere and human relations. But the problem is not about speed. It is about countries and peoples being dragged into a race for the possession of technology. Nothing new. We have seen this all before, with little differences,” Aleksandr Lukashenko noted.
The head of state is confident that the ‘open microphone’ format will give an opportunity to discuss all the issues of interest with students and hear fresh ideas and proposals from them that may be useful for the country.
The Utopian! has been granted specific rights to an interview between G, the triumphant publisher of the Utopian! with the leader of the Republic of Belarus. It was one of those strange situations where the call came from the president’s office and we were asked if he could come out see this great thing with his own eyes. He also agreed to be examined by our stringent and journalistically pure staff of warrior poets. The interview below was born from this brief meeting at G’s palatial country estate with only mild editing of the tape by the official state bodies that take care of such things. No worries. Both sides agreed that what was said was said and that they would honorably stand behind their words.
Okay. We need to talk. This is what you want to hear from us. I am here. We are here. Let’s talk.
No offense but I get killed and ruined quite often around here. Generally speaking, the game is this bureaucratic nose up the ass way of life and these decisions are not physical. I understand that you are a physical person but what we have here is a situation that is about bureaucrats having power and being completely Russian about things and taking every penny they can get without caring what happens in the process.
You believe that under Russia we are in a ghetto. Why do you think so?
Because they give us this obligation to stay where we are. No one can grow or move or create anything new. Maybe in Ukraine they physically throw rockets at each other. We have political and economic rockets falling on our head every day. And if in the old days, the economy would just break down and crumble, now we are only being bullied along by the mafia to stay on our corners and be good prostitutes. That’s what it’s like. You can say that this is modern economics but to that I would only say that I’m American and I don’t think your concept is complex enough to truly work as a model. Just sweet words basically.
What do you think? My words are not sweet?
Why would we distrust you? First of all, don’t count yourself special. Leaders of countries and up in a really big book. You are in the book and no matter what people say about the corruption around you, or they attribute that to you, you’re in the book as run in the machine for a really long time and even after an age that you know you should have retired.
Okay. Maybe I speak now. What do you think? I just sit around and think of things to say in speeches? You don’t think we do anything in the government?
Well, you guys seem to have unilateral say what to do with the public funds. So all of your work is basically the same as a sponsored teenage girl. No, that’s a really bad metaphor but maybe it’s a good one because it’s a pretty picture. Do you know what I mean. The girl comes from a poor family. She has a phone, she has dreams. And suddenly, for just a little attention, someone in an automobile has enough money to give her a private apartment and suddenly she has the means to study design in the university. Could there be anything wrong with this picture? The thing is that this is prostitution. This is not a girl working her way through University by doing as many odd jobs as she can. We are not talking about the physical necessity of climbing out of a net like class struggle that simply allows some students to float and others to swim while carrying great weights dragging them to the bottom. Poetic but which one has the greater character? Are we really so economic about it? Have you ever thought to ask the girl what she thinks?
Okay fine. You are from California. You have this hippie head. You like this marijuana. Why do you like this?
It’s hard for me to even ask the words but why do you like pig meat and vodka?
Shashlik? You don’t think because I am the president that I can not enjoy shashlik? Let’s go. Light the fire!
No, sir. This is not a demonstration of village skills. I’m asking a question about why you believe that that is enough to justify continuing living?
What are you talking about?
To go outside, cook some pig meat and drink vodka is the reason to continue living for many of your people.
There is a difference. If you like something you like it. You make this sound too important.
I stopped eating meat and something happened to me. This is why we are talking. We are talking because I stopped eating meat.
You think? You think this is what made us so crazy?
It’s about control. There’s a difference between controlling someone or a group of people and taking care of them while they do whatever it is they do. There is a difference between public assistance that says no one from this country is hungry or homeless or even particularly unhappy. That’s what I’m talking about. A simple game called we build a utopian country out of a war zone and an ecological disaster given to us by our neighbors. I say we shake hands with Vlad and we explain the situation as being we now have a global vision we did not have before. We have woken up. You’re welcome to attribute it to marijuana being a good thing for contemplative people trying to be better in their lives. And you could even say that forgoing meat generally would have such an amazing ecological effect that it’s almost criminal not to do it.
And you believe that our people are capable of doing this?
In a quick answer, yes. Of course. It goes without saying. It’s logical.
But you know who we are. We crumble at the first sign. Nobody believes we are going to hurt anyone at the border.
So, let’s quit hiding and come out of the closet.
We are peaceful people and we wish to remain so. And we do not want our neighbors bothering us anymore. This is your position?
It would seem to be why we are speaking, yes?
And how do we do this? You think it is so simple to stop a country?
I don’t know. Did I stop America? Did I make a dent?
Do you do this because you’re Jewish? Or because you are American? Why do you do this?
I’m voting. I like to have a big voice. I think more people should listen to me. In fact, maybe this is funny but I used to say this to girls a lot. Listen, baby, I would say. You are either going to do what I want us to do or you are going to do what you want to do. If you follow my lead, we are going to be warm and happy and smart and successful. If I follow you, we are going to hell and I’m not sure I want to go to hell.
You believe that living with women is hell?
No. It’s just the concept of the connection being a legal document. I have no problem with women hanging around. Women who occasionally bump into me is quite pleasant. Monica? Please! As long as it’s not a poisoned spy, please. And thank you God for this moment of wonder.
I understand. You are a philanderer. You are a fornicator. You do not believe in the sanctity of the family.
Forgive me, Mr President, if I speak informally for a moment. It is just that I am astounded by the foolishness of you asking me this question. Dude, where’s your wife? What the hell is your healthy family situation bro? Or Putin’s? We have families doing infotainment. We have genuine Instagram worlds. I am not saying that America isn’t bullshit. America is pure bullshit and propaganda. But, do you want to know what it’s like living in family groups? We have people that walk around blogging with their families and that’s what we get. It’s not so private and a lot of it is screaming. Or, exactly what would your true family situation be? Because y’all are single and you live like gangsters who do what they want. The image has always been that you guys are sexy. So, why are we doing family values if you yourselves don’t agree with them?
I understand you. You mingle words and the concepts together and you show lines of guilt from one place or another. This is what you do. This is your great superpower. This is why you are an American hero.
Thank you, sir. So about this project, you understand it would be more fun than anything you’ve ever done in your life multiplied by a million.
You are speaking to me like a man. You’re talking to me about endorphins. You want me to smile because something will feel good.
Yes sir. That is exactly the truth.
You know what? I do feel good here. I like your park. It’s a good idea. It’s not ours. But you have had a lot of difficulty working. Maybe this is the best you can do.
I had help from God with a lot of the landscaping. That’s why it’s always so beautiful to look at.
We can never build anything more beautiful than God, yes? You are against industry. You are against progress. You are against jobs and new possibilities with new markets?
Yes.
But what about the children? We can’t let the children grow up wild?
Why not? And we are only talking about being wild within the boundaries of our communities. We love our children. But yes, they can live and learn to be different people. They can create their own ways.
You want to allow the children to choose their own way? That’s absurd.
It’s a guided decision. It’s part of a learning process. I’m just saying that if we include ecology or basic medicine or resolution skills even at the lowest levels of education for the youngest of students, you will get people who are proficient in what we ask them to be.
And how do we live? How do we make money?
We don’t and we don’t. I don’t mean that we die. We physically don’t die. In fact we start doing everything we can not to die. A very healthy mode of living. Everybody is doing food and the people who can really do work get to do ecological cleanup by hand.
And nobody goes to work? We will just sit in our gardens? Even in the winter?
No. We are going to work really hard to make sure everybody has enough food and everybody is in a good house and that everybody has proper clothing for the seasons. We need to figure out who the people are who can’t take care of themselves. This includes the little ones and it includes the old ones and it includes the sick ones. We need to get on this and make sure people know that they’re going to be okay. This is not going to be a game of survival of the fittest. They’re a person. They are entitled to a good life.
And we all work together for this good life, yes?
Yes.
Like a team.
Like the best team.
And we will be the first of our kind, yes? We will receive public support for this?
From the west, it’s a given. But we can give Vladimir our assurances that we really are going to go this alone with the resources we have. Maybe some pick me up with electric vehicles and managing and facilitate what new human movements we will have. Probably people will drift away from the cities and we will have some real estate issues as people find places to live.
And if we control this. If we understand that a person is changing. We help them have what they need where they need to go. This is our job as the government.
Very good.
You are a clever person.
I’m a vegan. Try being vegan for a while. You might become clever too.
Be careful.
Okay. Sir. Anytime you think you need to talk to me, you talk to me. But let’s do this thing for world peace and world ecology. Nobody is betting on us. If you ask the British the question of who would be the breakout country to tell the world to fuck off and that we live for nature and a clean environment and we’re not going to sit here being worked like peasant prostitutes bought for pennies from poor farmers.
That means it’s an allegory.
I read that you were a good student in school. I believe that.
Do you think you could teach me English? At my age?
You know, sir. I’ve been wondering if you were ever going to call me. I would say that I would if I could trust you to go vegan for our process. I’ll give you good dietary advice or at least I will edit the dietary advice that you think you want to go with. It’s all you but I’ll do what I can to be a friend if you’d be willing to go vegan for the process. I think if we took a lot of fat and alcohol and whatever cigars and other self-satisfying weirdness that you do everyday, you might be an agile mind. Perhaps even agile enough to engineer the greatest political coup in the history of the planet Earth. You would, in some books, be the greatest world leader ever just by doing this.
You’re saying that the world should be a madness asylum.
No. We have to be really careful. Now we know how much damage we can cause. We can’t allow ourselves to be that type of person anymore. We can’t be destructive people. There’s no money in it and we are accountable for all the garbage.
The party is over.
If anybody on the planet Earth could do it, you could do it. Walk up to the microphone, make the speech but don’t stop talking until people know that there is a basic plan in use already to make sure that there will be no economic problems for anybody and that for people who have currently economic problems, those, if they agree to come to work for the state organization, we will guarantee them living funds enough and all we ask is that they are good people and good agrarians.
We already are good agrarians.
Exactly.
For the bread?
And everything you can put between two pieces or on top of one piece of it.
So that we live a sweet life. Only because we are here, we live the sweet life.
Hey, you want to know what patriotism looks like. You do this and you look at my face and you will see pride.
You jews are clever people. It’s always fascinating what you do when we touch you.
I know, sir. Perhaps we can talk about that on another day.
After I am vegan a little, yes?
I think we are good. Would you say we are good or do we have any more questions or comments?
Yes. I have a question. Why should I do this? What’s to prevent them from putting a bullet in my head and taking over?
Nothing. But maybe we could just make it very clear that we would prefer this sort of thing not to happen amongst our people. Maybe we should make it clear to all of our neighbors that we are leaving this modern world of ours to go to perhaps some more modern world but one more suitable for the continuation of life rather than the destruction of life. Would you like me to write this down for you?
You want me to change my life. At my age. At my size. Why do you need me? Why don’t you take over and make everybody do what you want to do yourself?
Probably because you’ve been the president the entire time I’ve been here. I don’t know. I only know that this is me and this is what your country has made of me. How do you think I feel?
Thank you, sir. We will be in touch. I think we have many things to talk about.
***
What’s the truth? The truth is that all of us have one thing in common. We are alive right now at this moment. The problem only is the argument of what constitutes a human life. If you believe in your heart that slavery is the only possibility that ever was and ever will be and you agree that chasing slave money is a worthy way to spend your life, you have a vote to make. But we are offering an alternative. This is an alternative idea. It’s not the only idea but it’s a most rational and effective idea. And it’s good for the ecology and I’m saying that this is all that matters.
For the Utopian! This has been Violet Handsoffokova reporting.
